|#2121||Real Programmers don't write in FORTRAN. FORTRAN is for pipe stress freaks and|
crystallography weenies. FORTRAN is for wimp engineers who wear white socks.
|#2122||Real Programmers don't write in PL/I. PL/I is for programmers who can't|
decide whether to write in COBOL or FORTRAN.
|#2123||Real Programmers think better when playing Adventure or Rogue.|
|#2124||Real programs don't eat cache.|
|#2125||Real Programs don't use shared text. Otherwise, how can they use functions|
for scratch space after they are finished calling them?
|#2126||Real software engineers don't debug programs, they verify correctness.|
This process doesn't necessarily involve execution of anything on a
computer, except perhaps a Correctness Verification Aid package.
|#2127||Real software engineers don't like the idea of some inexplicable and|
greasy hardware several aisles away that may stop working at any
moment. They have a great distrust of hardware people, and wish that
systems could be virtual at *___all* levels. They would like personal
computers (you know no one's going to trip over something and kill your
DFA in mid-transit), except that they need 8 megabytes to run their
Correctness Verification Aid packages.
|#2128||Real software engineers work from 9 to 5, because that is the way the job is|
described in the formal spec. Working late would feel like using an
undocumented external procedure.
|#2129||Real Users are afraid they'll break the machine -- but they're never|
afraid to break your face.
|#2130||Real Users find the one combination of bizarre input values that shuts|
down the system for days.
| ... ... |