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#4058 |  | Greener's Law: Never argue with a man who buys ink by the barrel.
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#4059 |  | Grelb's Reminder: Eighty percent of all people consider themselves to be above average drivers.
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#4060 |  | Griffin's Thought: When you starve with a tiger, the tiger starves last.
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#4061 |  | Grinnell's Law of Labor Laxity: At all times, for any task, you have not got enough done today.
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#4062 |  | Guillotine, n.: A French chopping center.
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#4063 |  | Gumperson's Law: The probability of a given event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.
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#4064 |  | Gunter's Airborne Discoveries: (1) When you are served a meal aboard an aircraft, the aircraft will encounter turbulence. (2) The strength of the turbulence is directly proportional to the temperature of your coffee.
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#4065 |  | gurmlish, n.: The red warning flag at the top of a club sandwich which prevents the person from biting into it and puncturing the roof of his mouth. -- Rich Hall, "Sniglets"
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#4066 |  | guru, n.: A person in T-shirt and sandals who took an elevator ride with a senior vice-president and is ultimately responsible for the phone call you are about to receive from your boss.
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#4067 |  | guru, n: A computer owner who can read the manual.
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